Felix's pov
"Hey! Wakey, wakey! Rise and shine, sweetheart!" A high-pitched cheerful male voice is the first thing that reaches my ear waking me up. The second thing I notice is the shooting pain in my head that pulls out an automatic scowl on my face even before I open my eyes. And the third thing I notice is someone patting my cheek lightly.
"Shut up, Ian! Go away!" I slap the hand away and turn to the other side burying my face deep into the soft surface of the pillow.
"No, no, no, no!" Ian's hand lands on my arm. "I'm taking you with me." A harsh tug. "Now wake up, sleepyhead!" Another tug and he manages to roll me on my back.
"Ian, please! Let me sleep!" I pull my other arm over my eyes.
I notice the change in Ian's voice when he starts again, "Wake up, Felix, or I'm gonna smack your ass so hard that-Oh, there you are. Good morning, sunshine!"
I squint at a blurry grinning face of Ian. As I squint more, the sleep wears off and the image gets clear. He's grinning like an idiot with all of his teeth full on display and his tongue hanging out of his mouth. The sick smug look on his face increases the pain in my head.
"Fuck you!" I groan pushing myself up off the bed and immediately cursing as it feels like a thousand needles is prickling on my forehead.
"Okay, now we got a cursing and mad Felix," Ian's annoying voice comes floating in the air. "That's a very rare sight but that's exactly what we should expect when some idiot finishes a whole bottle of bourbon in one go."
"I did that?" I ask and immediately cringe at how naive it sounds. Ian gives me a pointed look and hands me a bottle of aspirin and a glass of water. "Well, not only that. You did a hell lot of things last night. You literally shook everyone from this little world of yours."
I know that, from previous experience and from whatever bits and pieces I remember from last night. I remember some weird things as well and I'm not quite sure whether they actually happened or they are just my imagination. Because they involve somewhat romantic scenarios with a certain grumpy girl and the possibility of happening anything close to romantic with her is zero. Also, she doesn't have any reason to be here last night.
I throw two tablets of aspirin in my mouth and gulp down some water while hearing Ian speaking, "Sorry to disappoint you by showing my face while you were expecting Maisara's. She left as soon as I came."
The water flies out of my mouth as I choke on them. Ian is immediately by my side patting and rubbing my back. "Hey, be careful. Do you wanna die or something?"
Maisara was here? The whole night? That means those memories..........
"How did you choke suddenly? Did you remember something perverted things you did last night?" Ian teases me when I calm down finally. I glare at him. "Shut up! I'm not you."
But the truth is I remember some weird things, not perverted but weird, doing with Maisara. That seems surreal and kinda embarrassing too, if they actually happen. I don't even remember anything clearly to say whether they actually happened or how far did I embarrass myself in front of her.
I rub a hand over my face. God, what did I do? Why did I drink in the first place? Moreover, how did she end up in this house?
"Moreover, you look horrible," Ian comments earning another scowl from me. He looks me up and down before taking a step closer and sniffing the air. Letting out a gagging sound, he frowns at me. "God, you smell like shit and piss mixed together. Go wash up. Call me if you need any help. Come downstairs when you're done. I've ordered something considered to be breakfast."
Taking the bottle of aspirin and the glass with a hell lot of dramatic gestures, Ian leaves the room. I sigh leaning my head against the headrest. This is gonna be a long and painful day.
Almost half an hour later-
"You're calling that breakfast?" I ask Ian slowly, gawking at the bowl full of white sauce pasta in front of me.
"Well, I said 'something considered to be breakfast'," Ian points out with his mouth full of the same thing that's placed in front of me.
"I'm pretty sure no one in this world considers this as breakfast," I mumble stabbing the cylinder-shaped substances and examining them. Don't get me wrong, I do love pasta. But that's not really something to eat the first thing in the morning, especially not when I'm dealing with a hangover.
"A lot of people do actually," Ian says as a matter of fact, pointing his fork at me. I shrug keeping the fork back into the bowl and pushing it away. "Sorry, I'm not one of them."
"Just eat that, bro." Ian rolls his eyes at me. "Or do you want me to make you something?"
At one glance, his offer may seem generous unless someone has a taste of his food. I'm pretty sure he will end up gaining the world record for the most horrible cook in the world one day.
"No, thanks, I would prefer neither of them." Offering him a fake smile, I get up from the stool and make my way to the coffee maker. "A cup of coffee will do for me."
"Nope, you're gonna finish that bowl right now," Ian hollers after me. When I give him no attention, he adds, "Or do you want me to call your Maisara?"
And he succeeds in gaining my attention. I whip my head towards him almost instantly to only find him with a mischievous grin. The scowl returns to my face when I get what he's trying to do. I almost snap at him, "What do you mean by 'my Maisara'? And exactly why do you need to call her now?"
He shrugs moving on his stool to face me properly. "You know exactly what I mean by 'your Maisara'. And I need to call her to make you eat as you tend to only listen to her nowadays."
"Yeah, bullshit," I mumble pouring water into the maker. Of course, Ian hears that and doesn't waste time retorting back, "You can't refuse that after last night. I have proof."
I shake my head, mumbling again as I pour coffee grounds this time. "I'm not refusing." Pausing as I place the cup and start the machine. Then I turn around to face him. "You're right. I tend to listen to her nowadays."
He's staring at me with wide eyes, his expression screaming surprise. Any sort of amusement that was there seconds ago is long gone. After a good minute of gaping at me, he finally gets back to his senses and starts stuttering, "Woah, I-" He clears his throat, still clearly processing what I've said. "I-I didn't expect you to actually admit that."
"I know." I walk back to the stool I was sitting on earlier and sit down there facing him. "I didn't expect either."
"Okay," he extends the y with an irritating sound which immediately earns an eye roll from me. I know where this is going. "So, when are you gonna tell her?"
"Tell her what?" I squint at him in confusion. I know what he's gonna say but I just don't wanna know that. Does anyone get that feeling? Or is it just me?
"That you love her." I'm glad that my coffee is still brewing or I would have choked on it now. Though I expected him to say something weird, I didn't know it would be this much weird. I gap at him for one good minute trying to process that he really said what I heard. When the process is finally finished and I finally get that it's just Ian being Ian, I shake my head at him. "Seriously, Ian, you need to stop jumping to conclusions."
The sound of the coffee maker goes off indicating that my coffee is done. Perfect timing.
"There wouldn't be an Ian without jumping to conclusions." I can even feel him shrugging behind me. I take the cup and turn off the machine before returning back to my seat.
"Felix." I look in his direction at his weird change of voice. Sure, he has a weird look as well. "I'm gonna say something important now."
I lazily take my first sip of the coffee. "Of course, you are." He gives me another look without saying anything and I realize he actually has a serious look in his eyes. I sit straight. "Say it."
He puts the fork back into his bowl and locks the fingers of his both hands together getting into an Ian-like serious position. Clearing his throat, he starts, "Anyway, so what I was saying is that I support you on however you want to proceed from here. You have me with you. I'm gonna do anything you need me to do. But there are things I suppose you need to consider before doing anything. I guess you know them already or do you need me to say them out loud for you?"
He pauses and I'm surprised to see him actually pause. I thought it's gonna be at least a half an hour one-way lecture. Ian is usually being silly and funny and not serious most of the time. But when he's serious, that's gonna be one hell of a lecture and he won't bother any distraction in between. I don't even know what he has to be serious about now because nothing is happening here. But then again it's Ian and you never know what makes him serious and what doesn't.
"You're just jumping to conclusions as I told you. But anyway, say whatever you want to say. It's not like you're gonna listen to me anyway," I reply taking another sip from the coffee.
He squints at me with eyebrows knitted together and unlocks his hands to point one of his index fingers at me. "Say whatever you wanna say but Ian Kent always knows the deepest, darkest thoughts on people's minds."
I take another sip and shrug at him. "And that makes you a creep."
Ian dismisses me with a gesture of his hand, of course, and focuses back on his lecture, "Anyway, so what I was saying is that there are things you need to consider before you want to do anything with Maisara."
He pulls out his index finger again, not pointing at me, just pointing upwards in a gesture that indicates that it's his first point. "First of all, she is a Muslim. Now before you say anything, I don't hate Muslims or have anything against them. I even have some Muslim friends. The point is that you cannot date her or even marry her. Getting what I meant?"
I just take another sip of my coffee in reply and watch him closely. He rubs his chin as if thinking of something before continuing, "There are some Muslims who marry someone from another religion but I don't think she's gonna be the one."
He leans forward with interest, "I mean the last time I saw her was when she was Ryker's girl and she was a practicing Christian and quite religious back then. Even her family was like that."
He pauses again and starts circling on the countertop with his finger. "I mean that, back then, it didn't seem like she was gonna convert or something. So there must be a super strong reason for her conversion."
Another pause. He shakes his head as he looks back at me before continuing, "I don't think she will be willingly breaking any of the rules of her current religion. And that's only one problem when I'm not even considering other facts. There are so many odds on your way if you wanna go down that path. My suggestion will be that you should consider giving them a thought. I know I'm thinking way ahead probably but this situation will come one day or other. You need to be prepared for that."
I take some time to let his word sink in. Luckily, Ian understands and stays quiet. To be honest, what he said isn't something new. I've thought that too. But it never seemed serious enough to consider. I mean I can just hang out with her and be a friend normally, no?
I can't actually. If I do, then there always will be a chance for me to catch feelings for her, even if the chance is small like a button. I know for a fact that the chance is not that small now and it will grow bigger and bigger with time. And things will get complicated as Ian has suggested.
But now, what? Should I just cut her off and move on with my life? Can I actually do that? Feelings aside, I haven't even thanked her properly for last night. Shouldn't I do that first before considering anything else?
Yes, I should do that. Anything else can wait for later. I'll consider whatever is there to consider later when the right time comes.
Making up my mind, I look back at Ian. "Thanks, Ian, for your..........words. Just so you know, I'm not thinking anything that deep. We are just friends though I'm pretty sure she doesn't even consider me as a friend. She helped me a lot and I'm truly grateful to her for that. Nothing more is going on. However, thanks again for your advice. I'll keep them in mind."
He nods with an appreciative smile. "Anytime, bro."
I take my coffee cup to the sink and it comes to my mind suddenly. I turn back to Ian. "Speaking of helping, can you give me her number, please? I need to thank her for last night."
His face lights up with a grin as he nods again. "Of course."
Maisara's pov
"A little bit to the left. Yes, yes, there. Thanks, my dear!"
I move my hands and squint my eyes at the scenery of a world of fairy tales. "Maria, you sure this is where you want it?"
The same voice, a little wobbly, comes from behind me, "Yes! That's the perfect place. Makes sense with the surrounding. You can come down now."
I glance around the said 'surrounding' and still find no sense at all. But who am I to talk? I obey the owner of the wobbly voice and climb down the ladder. Even from down here, I try to make sense of the fairy tale scenery in between the world of thousands of books and still find nothing. I look down at the owner of the wobbly voice, an old lady in her eighties, with white hair like wool and wrinkles around her soft and kind eyes. My face probably resembles confusion as she laughs at me and says, "Still finding no sense, Mia Cara?"
I shake my head, pretty sure I'm looking like an idiot now. But I don't really care when it's her who's seeing me like this. Maria, the owner and librarian of a really old library that's situated on the outskirt of the city, laughs again and out of nowhere whacks me on the head. "And you call yourself a bookworm?"
I scowl at her rubbing the place where she hit me. "I never called myself a bookworm before."
"That's the fantasy section, idiot!" She almost yells at me and it suddenly makes sense. My eyes automatically widen in realization as I look up at the nameplate of the section and find "fantasy" written in bold words before looking down at her. How did I miss that?
"Where is your head?" She crosses her arms over her chest as she huffs at me. A warning alarm goes off in my head as I take in her posture. The way she's standing and looking at me screams danger. It means she has sensed something and is gonna drill me for it until I open my mouth. Crap, that's bad!
"Nothing, Maria, I just didn't have much sleep last night. Which is why, my brain is lagging." I give her a weak smile for which I cringe inside myself. As a way to run away from her, I proceed to start pulling the ladder. But she pauses me just in time with a hand on my arm and a stern look on her face. "And why didn't you get much sleep at night?"
Well, here we go. I squirm a little under her hard gaze. When she looks at me like that, I'm totally undone.
"Work. I had work," I somehow manage to utter under my breath staring at my feet. She releases my arm. Did she just believe me? Surprised, I look up at her only to find how terribly wrong I am. Her heartbroken look tugs something inside my chest.
"Liar. You liar. I can't believe you just lied to me," she accuses in a hushed whisper as her eyes turn glassy. She even takes a step backward. Before she can do anything else, I stop her.
"Okay, okay, calm down. It's not that big of a deal. I just kind of.............lost the apartment I used to live in and-"
I don't even get the chance to finish before she cuts in, "Oh my God, dear, I'm so sorry. Where are you living right now? Do you-Oh God, do you need-"
"Calm down, old lady," I smile at her. "It's nothing. I manage to-"
I get cut off again. This time not by her, but by my own phone ringing in my pocket. As I pull it out to check, I find an unknown number.
"Wait a second, okay?" Saying that to Maria, I answer the call. "Hello?"
"Good morning, Mai-" I cut off the call as soon as the voice reaches me through the phone and stare at the screen with a horrified look. That voice, that goddamn voice, that goddamn deep voice that doesn't suit his soft feature. I would recognize it anywhere without a doubt, even in my sleep, even if I lose my memory, and even if I go deaf. Well, that's access because I won't even be able to hear in the first place if I go deaf but that's not the point here.
So why in the freaking world is he calling me now? When I thought of ending every connection with him after last night? Because I can very well picture what will happen if I allow myself to continue whatever it is that's going on between us and the last thing I want is getting my life any more complicated than it already is.
Maybe if I just keep ignoring his calls, he will give up eventually? And now he doesn't even know where I live. So there's almost no chance of him finding me unless he tries really really hard which I doubt anyone would do for me, let alone him.
Yes, that's what I need to do. I need to keep ignoring him until he gives up. That's for the best.
"What happened? Who is that?" Maria pulls me out of my thoughts. I look at her to find her curious eyes going back and forth between my face and my phone. I flash her a quick smile.
"No one. Just some wrong number." I put the phone in silent mode and shove it in my pocket. Then I wrap my hand around her shoulder and start walking towards where the tables and chairs are placed for reading. "Let's sit there and I'm gonna tell you why I couldn't sleep last night."
And as we sit down on those vintage chairs, I tell her everything about how I ended up losing the apartment and lie about how it ended up taking my sleep last night, carefully avoiding any details of Felix Reyes in the whole story. All the while my right thigh keeps vibrating with the continuous calls from that certain golden-brown-haired guy.
Almost half an hour later-
"My goodness, I had no idea you're going through so much right now," Maria wipes her eyes with her white handkerchief. I lose a breath. I didn't mean to make her cry. But then again she's a really sensitive person and ends up crying almost every slightest issue. Also, it's her who wanted to know what happened in the first place. And I didn't even bother to tell her the actual reason.
"It's okay now. I've found a place," I said with a reassuring smile placing my hand on her other hand. She grabs my hand instantly and looks at me with tearful eyes.
"But that's temporary. What will you do if you don't find any other places before the time is up?" she insists which makes me sigh again. Well, that's an issue I still need to think about.
"I'll find something by then." I pat her hand lightly. "I promise.
She keeps staring at me with those sad eyes until I'm the one who looks away. Then I feel her putting her hand on my head gently. As I look back at her, she says, "You've suffered enough already, Mia Cara. Come live with me. You don't need to suffer anymore."
The look on her face, the kindness in her eyes, and her touch and the desperation of that very same thing in me, all of that mix up inside of me and bring up my buried emotion. I start feeling the familiar burning behind my eyes. I blink to get rid of it and nod at her. "I promise to do so if I don't find anything by the time."
A smile slowly forms on her lips as she opens her mouth. But before a word gets out, a loud ting sound resonates throughout the library. Someone has come and belled the ring at the reception.
"Who is it?" Maria and I say that at the same time, both of us are full of curiosity, as it's rare for someone to even find this ancient library, let alone come here. The last time, I saw someone else here beside me............ Well, I don't remember when.
"Let me get that," Maria gets up from her chair. I get up too. "I'll come with you."
She nods and we both walk back to the reception. And I instantly regret following Maria here as I see who it is that has managed to find this library and graced us with his presence.
There, with one arm leaning against the reception desk, is standing in a white t-shirt and grey sweatpants the very same person whom I have been ignoring for the past half an hour. He flashes his too-white teeth as soon as his eyes land on me and purrs, "Hello, my dear Eudaemon."
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